Here's something you don't see everyday, an FSU Football player being arrested
Oops, I just realized I messed up on this post. Dickville and Knoxville are the same city.
Because they have convinced someone that they are worth it. It's not how good you are, its how good people think you are.
Rented Boiler Room last night. It really gave me an insight to cold-calling telemarketers. I used to be so nice to them, waiting for them to give their pitch, politely saying no, waiting again for them to counter, and so forth. At the end, they weren't able to hook me and basically wasted time. I used to think that they were just doing their jobs and being rude to them would hurt their feelings. Okay, here is where reality comes in. Before I even take my hand away from the phone, they are already dialing their next number. Which comes to my point. Don't trust anyone that wants your money. They will tell you anything to get the sale. I had a woman from MCI start to flirt with me and tell me I sound sexy. My worst experience with this was when I leased my car. The actual sales guy was OK, he didn't throw any curveballs, he was just very persistent. They had this factory rep their that was giving out $2000 rebates. He was an asshole to begin with. He was very adamant about the fact that he was leaving the following morning and if I waited I would miss out on the $2000 off. Classic. Make the customer commit right there. Giving the customer time to think might lose the sale. The worst was that he was talking down to me, like "You're a fucking idiot if you don't jump on this right now!". Of course when I went back a few days later to take care of something, the rep was still there. He said hello to me with this big gloating smile on his face which whispered "I got you".
| Me: | Hello? |
| Telemarketer: | May I please speak with the woman of the house? |
| Me: | This is she |
| Telemarketer: | click |
I telecommuted today. Attached to the office by a pair of copper wires. I figure it takes me an hour to get showered, clothed, breakfasted, and drive all the way up to Temple Terrace, so I give myself an extra hour of sleep. I dail in the same time I'd be getting into the office. The bad thing is that at the end of the day, you don't get to go anywhere.
I really have nothing to say today. My mind is a complete blank. It's not easy to keep coming up with things worth writing about, especially when people keep asking you to update your page so they have something to read when they should be working!!! Yes I know, I'm not one to talk. I realized this morining on the way to work that I think of really wierd things when I'm driving. This morning, I was trying to name all the cities I could think of that end in -ville: Nashville, Louisville, Gainesville, Jacksonville, Knoxville, Swoyersville, Titusville, Dickville (I'm not kidding! Its between Swoyersville and Exeter - I saw it when I was looking up how to spell Swoyersville). Speaking of not paying attention when driving. They still have not fixed the dent in the guardrail on I-275 just north of Sligh Ave which bears an uncanny likeness to the front of my Honda.
I am drinking a Tequiza - (Beer with blue agave nectar and a natural flavor of Mexican tequila and lime). It tastes like Corona, but leaves a sweeter aftertaste. I'm trying to decide if I like it. NOTE: It was $6.99 for 6, so it seems the Blue Agave shortage has not affected Tampa yet.
Jack finally watched Fight Club. He loved it, of course. We were discussing the movie with Morgynne (another co-worker) and I found it interesting that all three of us had different views as to what the movie was all about. Jack took the anarchist angle (man vs. society). I see the movie as being the angel on one's shoulder vs. the devil on the other shoulder (man vs. himself). Morgynne then threw something that I didn't catch. Project Mayhem was was an anarchist group which wanted to disrupt society's rules, however within their ranks, there was strict discipline and order. Irony. She also said something about "Organizations taken too seriously take on lives of their own"
Ok, I know that we as humans consume faster than nature can replinish, and I accept the fact that certain resources are going to endure shortages. But none has ever broght tears to my eyes like this
"Don't ever miss the opportunity to shut the fuck up"
I recently started to tell people exactly this when the situation warrants. I really think I need to follow suit. I don't think about what I say, I just say it. On the better side, my spontaneous dialog comes from the heart. It is not manicured, practiced, or refined. When I pay someone a compliment or speak highly of them, I really mean it. On the not so better side, it also broadcasts things I don't like about people, which, yes, has gotten me into trouble. So far, I've been able to smooth over the situation, but someday I'm going to say the wrong thing at the wrong time to the wrong person.
Saturday we ended up at Tahiti Joe's. A club at the end (beginning?) of Ybor. Our night was winding down, and I was tired and halfway drunk. Some guy has bumped into me which of course happens in large clubs so I thought nothing of it. He obviously thought something of it and expressed himself in a not so made-for-PBS manner. My brain said to ignore it and walk away, but that was after I had spun around with a retort. Opportunity to shut up #1: missed. Luckily, Mr Bouncer was right there and stepped in so my interaction with other person was not going to go any farther. Un-Luckily, Mr Bouncer wanted to show me how big he was and that he could "throw my ass out of here without thinkin' 'bout it!". Brain to Mike: Nod your head and walk away. Again the advice came a little to late as I informed Mr Bouncer that he was being Mr Dick. Opportunity to shut up #2: missed. Mr Bouncer then introduced me to Mr Street.
I've taken stock of all the CD related electronics that I own:
- Creative CD-ROM (32x)
- Memorex CD-RW (4x2x2x)
- Sony 5-Disc Changer
- Sony Discman
- Sony Playstation
- Alpine 6-Disk Car Audio CD Changer
What would I ever do without my digital media?
Jack and I went to American Cafe (Mozzerella's) for lunch today. The waitress placed down a large white piece of paper which covered the whole table, and a few crayons. I asked if they were bought out my Maccaroni Grill, but she said that they were ripping off the idea. Then then attempted to write her name "Nicole" upside down so it was facing us. I asked her if they gave her training classes on how to write upside down, she said No, it took her a few days to perfect it. She then went on to say that the hardest letter in her name to write upside-down was the "N". I felt like being nice and didn't point out that an "N" is written the same way upside-down as is is right-side-up.
Boring weekend alert! I get to babysit a support pager which requires a 30 minute response time, so I will not be around. If you want to come hang out with me at home, you're always welcome, well, not you.
Yeah, I know, I'm slacking on the posts lately. I promise I will write something interesting tomorrow when I'm at work. Why the hell would I want to waste my personal time? Oh what the hell, I'm already here.
I started going to the gym again. I tried to get my Gold's Gym membership transferred down the the South Tampa location, but its out of business. So, I have been going back to Tampa Palms. Its not that far from work, so I've been taking clothes with me to work, although I discovered today that it is not a good idea to leave your shorts and shirt in the same bag as your shoes in the passenger seat where the sun bakes it during the day. On the bright side, it was like having my own personal gym since everyone else kept to the other side of the room. Here is the makeup of the people who go to my gym: 60% rich college kids who are way to trendy to use the USF fitness center which they get to use for FREE, 20% working people who sit behind a desk for 8 hours a day (me), 15% housewifes that don't work, and 5% strippers. People generally keep to themselves and there is rarely a wait for equipment (especially if you smell like sweaty feet).
Went to Allison’s last night for dinner. We ended up playing LIFE (The board game). Actually it was the new rules LIFE. The old LIFE was better. In the new LIFE you drive a stationwagon instead of a convertible, you choose career and salary cards instead of landing on your job, and they have these things called LIFE cards which help you win. For some reason, I kept spinning 1’s and 2’s so my LIFE was proceeding rather slowly. As everyone else was graduating and getting jobs, I was buying books and meeting new friends. When everyone else was buying houses and having kids, I graduated college and drew a career card of “Superstar”. There is a space in the first mountain range on the lower right corner of the board that says “Get Lost – lose 1 turn”. Of course, I “got lost”. I figure one turn in LIFE = 4 actual years, so after 16 years of college to become a superstar, I got lost for 8 years. Who the hell gets lost for 8 years? Maybe since LIFE is a family game, it is their way of saying you got thrown in prison for trying to sell crystal meth to 7 year olds. Now if the square had only said that, then I could understand. Then I had to marry some girl picked randomly out of a plastic baggie. Boy, she was a slut! A few spins later I had 5 kids. I’m not even sure two of them were mine. Our car didn’t have enough space so we had to tie one to the roof. I eventually made it to the Millionaire’s mansion, minus two kids. They had fallen out somewhere and I neglected to put them back in. That’s Ok, I didn’t like those two anyway. After a cash and LIFE card count, I was declared the winner with a net worth around 2.3 million. Not bad for a Superstar.
So I'm watching a Friends rerun last night around 7:30 - 8ish pretty much because there was nothing else on at that time on that channel. It was the episode where Ross and Rachael finally kiss. Which in my opinion was like Gilligan getting off the Island; who the hell wants to watch it after that?. During the entire show they are talking about getting a cat or something and that was supposed to show a long term commitment between Ross and his Chinese girlfriend. So as they are discussing getting this cat, I get a knock on my door. It was half-naked Rob. "Do you want a cat?" he asked. I felt like I was in some sort of strange dimension where reality and TV combine, except I don't get to kiss Jennifer Aniston. Have you ever told someone a story about your past then realize that it actually never happened and it was something you saw on TV? Yeah, I usually get a strange look when I tell people I used to drive a bright orange Dodge Charger with a rebel flag on the top through the back roads of Georgia being chased by the local cops. Who needs reality anyway?
Picked up a copy of American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis. Its supposed to be disturbingly good.
In case I didn't tell you, a well placed lightning bolt fried my modem at home last weekend and I had to get a new one. I also got one of those phone line surge protector thingies. If you live in Florida and don't have one, I highly recommend them. I am now back up and operational at home.
Allison told me this great quote, Its not exact, and I'm not sure who said it:
"Inside me there are two dogs, one is pure evil, and the other is pure good. Every day the evil dog attacks the good dog. You ask me which one wins? Whichever one I feed more"
She also read me the quote from Frued: (again, not exact)
Thought is merely training for behaviour
I don't agree with this. If it were true, I would've killed a lot more people.
Now this is what I need around the office, a Blood Alcohol Content Calculator
According to the Geek-O-Meter v 3.14.2, I am a:
GEEK IN TRAINING
You've been observing the geeks. You act like a geek sometimes but you've yet to perfect the moves. You're a few bytes short of a meg. Spend more time online, get to know your computer, and schmooze with made geeks. Sow the geek seeds now and you'll grow real fast. Your name says it all. Head over to Training and Certification.
Thank you to all those who took the time out of their busy lives to wish me a happy birthday yesterday. And if you forgot, don't worry about it. I'm sure you had much more important things to worry about and I wish you well spending the rest of eternity in the boiling pits of hell.
Every morning, I sit at my desk surrounded by storm cloud grey cubicle walls staring into the two computer monitors which will become my world for the next eight hours and ask myself the same question over and over again. "Why, oh why, didn't I take the
I was in a wierd mood all night tonight. We all hung out next door for Rob's birthday, but try as I might, I couldn't get in a social mood. There seems to be something amiss. I've felt it for the past week or so, but couldn't placed it. Work is great, friends are great, family is great, so WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG?!? Then I finally hit it. I really do not want to turn 25. Yeah, I know 25 is still young and all that, but I'm going to be in my upper twenties now. I don't feel 25. I'm not done with my lower 20's yet. I've decided to postpone my birthday for a few more years.
There seems to be a bit of confusion regarding this post. I did not get a new job, I got a new company. GTE no longer exists. GTE and Bell Atlantic merged to become Verizon. I am truly and deeply sorry for any misconceptions this may have caused and hope that any damages that may have been inflicted heal quickly.
Maybe I should patent the way I hold my mouse when I'm downloading... err, nevermind.
I hope everyone had a great 4th of July. Mine was rather wet. It was clear all day long then we had some pretty spectacular lightning and some rain, but it cleared up, and we were free to celebrate the birth of our nation with two of Americas most time honored traditions: Beer and Explosives.
I am now officially an employee of Verizon Communications. My work email was switched to myname@verizon.com (the old one still works). Every employee received a package containing our Verizon propaganda and a VHS tape. Since my VCR is broken, maybe I can get them to expense me a new one so I can watch their tape. Why not, how much did they spend to make a video and distribute it to every employee in the company? a few hundred bucks more won't matter.
Yes, I too miss the old MTV, but I'm not about to put forth the energy of writing a letter about it
(Beer bottle clink to David for the link)
So I'm sitting here watching Bay News Nine, because it's the only channel I get, when a thought enters my head (as they do from time to time) that I should at least get the major network channels. So I got the mice in my head running and figured I should disconnect the cable box. I now have all my channels back, except HBO.
In other news, I recieved an Individual Excellence award at work on Friday. Yeah, I know it's just a piece of paper, but its nice to know that somebody is paying attention.
Ok, some spelling errors are a given, Blogger does not have a spell check and I type almost as fast as I talk. But this is no ordinary spelling error. For the entire 24 years and 357 days that I've been on this planet, I have been under the false impression that 'of course' was spelled 'of coarse'. (Well actually I probably didn't even learn to say 'of course' until I was like 2, so the above figure is merely an estimate), The thing of it is that nobody ever caught me on it. You all just left me to my ignorant bliss figuring that someone will correct me eventualy (Kudos to Jack!). I place the blame completely on Mrs. Springfield. I figure that 'of course' would show up on a spelling test around the 3rd grade level, and Mrs. Springfield was my 3rd grade teacher. At the hands of her incompetence, I endured years of mis-education. Just thinking of all the people who have laughed behind my back. "Hey there goes Mike 'Can't spell of course' Grasso, Ha Ha", like Nelson from the Simpsons. So in the future, if you notice a spelling error, drop me a note. (NOTE: There is no prize for the person who finds the most errors, So don't act like there is). Anyway, I got to go get Allison to go to lunch (And NO!! you DON'T get to email me about grammatical errors such as "I got to go")